asgardeventide | [Anon Text] The editors are not responsible for any possible side effects.

Denizens of Asgard!
You wanted to know the truth about these so called gods?
The As(s)Guardian has heard you!
No more secrets! No more unanswered questions!
ARE YOUR BODIES WELL PREPARED?

The truth is shocking, isn't it?
How is it possible to be living under the ruling of such vitiate deities?
Well, dear readers, it shouldn't be a problem at all.
BECAUSE THE TRAVELLERS ARE AS BAD AS THEIR UNPOPULAR GODS!

And let's not forget about our blinging redhead and his collection of fanboys and fangirls!
~~Or should we say 'his pimps and ho's~~

Asgard is sure filled with tragic love stories, isn't it?
We could even say... inspiring!
ALLOW LADIES ROXY AND EURI TO SHARE THE MOST ROMANTIC LITERATURE WRITTEN BY THEIR VERY OWN LOVING HANDS

The keen eyes of The As(s)guardian have noticed that some of our lovely denizens struggle with the act of kissing. And if isn't the act of kissing itself it is kissing the wrong person!
My, such tragedy!
Therefore our glorious magazine has provided a most handy Kissing Guide. The complete overview of how to kiss with the tongues. We also had the (involuntary) help of Asgard's most famous kissing ninja duo: Whiskers and Sasuke. Please utilize this handy-dandy guide and become a MASTER OF KISSING!

{Images based on real events. That's what they teach you in ninja academy.}

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

((ooc: Well, ladies and gentlemen, here it is! The post for the Gossip Girl plot! ~~Anything too dumb I'm blaming it on Loki.~~ I'm turning off my notifs so feel free to mingle and jump on each other. Remember the network is glitchy so have fun with that too! Jack and Loki will anonfail some time in the comments so keep an eye out for them. If you need to contact us for anything, comment on the ooc plotting post or shoot us a pm.))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It is the stupidest thing ever! Why would anyone think it's actually useful?

It is not. It is of great educational value.

Educational? That's the worst way to learn how to kiss. People will be like, licking each other faces or something. Eww.

Kissing is licking eachother's mouths inside and outside, you see?

Ugh, you're gonna make the newbies into bad kissers. Have YOU ever kissed someone before?

Feel free to correct them when you encounter a kissing couple. I think the guide is most sufficient. Have you kissed?

[Loki evades that last question like a pro.]

[Evasion noted.]

Of course I have. And without the need of such a stupid guide. But you didn't answer my question. Bet you never kissed anyone before.

Why wouldn't I have kissed anyone? I have kissed many maidens. They have all experienced the silky feel of my tongue against theirs, followed by a lot of wiggling and spit.

Because you totally have no idea how to kiss someone. A lot of spit and wiggling? Give me a break.

Everyone has his or her own techniques. But it does involve the wiggling of the tongues. One cannot deny such a thing!</font?

Can't say no to that, but the spit... Seriously, that's not necessary.

Edited 2013-08-27 23:49 (UTC)

Are you telling me that tongues are dry?

[She sighs, though he can't hear.]

Useless to discuss with you... Try kissing someone sometime.

But you are telling untruths!

Fine fine, your guide is the best ever.

[Yeah, she's tired of fighting him via text.]

[One cannot beat Loki when it comes to text-fights, dear maiden!]

Thank you :-D

All I have to say for the moment, kid. See ya.

[Anon Text] The editors are not responsible for any possible side effects.

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[text, he thinks its anon but whelp, glitch]

[text] good thing she doesn't know him in person (yet)

[text] I'm sure they can be beeeeest friends :D

[text] Well, he's Loki, she's Idun... Do the math...

[text] Best friends! :"B

[text] LOL!

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